Maybe, just maybe, I am doing something right.

Today was an amazing day! Church filled my soul with so much gratitude and happiness that I almost couldn’t hold my emotions back even after returning home…

Last night Trevin told me he was going to bear his testimony at church. I was slightly caught off guard knowing I hadn’t really encouraged this or ever asked him about it (because I wanted it to be his choice). He explained to me that his primary teacher had encouraged all her students to bear their testimony on Sunday. Knowing Trevin was considering this made me sort of sad because Colby is out of town. I wanted him to be there to see it, but also didn’t want to discourage Trevin from doing it. Honestly, I had been contemplating even attending sacrament with three kids alone. Looking back, I think this was part of the Lord’s way of telling me I needed to embrace the challenge and attend all three meetings.

I put the kids to bed last night and debated setting my alarm to get up for sacrament meeting. I knew I needed to but honestly, I just didn’t want to. I really wanted to watch a chick flick by myself and eat a banana creamie in silence (it had been one of those days). I went to the freezer only to find someone had eaten the last cherished creamie. Bummer. I sat on the couch, turned on the TV, and couldn’t get myself to pay attention to anything I was watching. After about ten minutes of pointless TV, I decided to head to bed (at 8:30). I set my alarm and said a prayer.

The alarm went off bright and early and I stubbornly went right back to bed. A few minutes later the snooze function on my phone kicked in and I was out of bed again. To the shower I went…

As I walked downstairs from the shower, I found Trevin pouring a bowl of cereal for his brothers. Trevin & Easton were both in their church suit with their shoes on as well. All three of them were eating cereal and getting ready by themselves for church. I was amazed! After breakfast, Trevin grabbed a set of scriptures for him and Easton and while sitting at our small table in the kitchen, he read from the Book of Mormon. That has never happened! My heart swelled as I stood in the bathroom listening to them quietly.

Sacrament meeting came and something was different in Trevin’s attitude. He usually can’t hold still for more than three minutes and his constantly asking for a snack. Today was different. He didn’t move a muscle and sat quietly the entire time. Towards the end of the meeting, he asked if there was enough time for him to share his testimony. I explained we only had a few minutes and it would depend on how long the current speaker took. With about six minutes left in sacrament meeting, I turned to see Trevin walking up the aisle. I suddenly got nervous and grabbed Cohen knowing him and Easton would want to see him.

Trevin walked right up to the pulpit without any fear and started his testimony:

“I like to bear my testimony. I know the church is true. I am grateful for my family and my primary teachers. I am grateful to be a member of the church and I am glad Briggs (Wright) could be baptized yesterday. I know Joseph Smith was a true Prophet. I love the scriptures and like reading the Book of Mormon. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.”

Tears filled my eyes. How could it possibly be, that my oldest son was old enough to bear his testimony without any help, with confidence, and with such a positive attitude? He didn’t rush his testimony or say what the last child had said. I truly believe he said what he meant and I felt the love he had for the gospel.

This past week has been a struggle with Colby being gone. While I haven’t complained to anyone, I miss having him here to help me with the boys. I’ve had a lot of struggles with Trevin and Easton especially and found myself wondering what I could do differently at home to help them educationally, spiritually, and also help them know how loved they are. Today helped me understand that although I still have things to work on as a mother, maybe, just maybe, I am doing something right as a mother.

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